Porky/Sylvester Horror Vacation Trilogy -- Episode Two -- Yes, Andrea, There Is A Sanity Claws

The Censorship Report for “The Night Watchman” will not be seen today, because he got scared off by the murderous mice that came from the following horrifying segment…

Sarthurva U and Andrea Hicks are back, and continuing their look at the Porky/Sylvester horror vacation trilogy. This is the second one, “Claws for Alarm.” This one is considered the scariest, most artistic one in the lot, thanks to Maurice Noble’s artwork and eerie color palette, the tighter pacing, how it leans more into horror than comedy, the mice being more of a threat (and not vanquished at all), and the subtle inklings that this was going to be a 3D cartoon in the same vein as “Lumber Jack-Rabbit.”

Like “Scaredy Cat,” this one also had edits to it, but “Claws for Alarm” had more of them, and Cartoon Network actually left this uncut in the twilight years of the channel airing classic Warner Bros shorts. I’ll let Sarthurva and Andrea explain. The blog will be back to its regularly-scheduled format next time.

Porky's Romance (Dog-Gone Love)

 

Director: Frank Tashlin (credited as “Frank Tash”)

Summary: In this, the debut of Porky Pig’s shallow love interest, Petunia Pig (who isn’t as nice and bland as later incarnations), and the final cartoon with Joe Dougherty as the voice of Porky (who was let go because Dougherty’s actual stutter was slowing down voice recording. It’s the opposite of what we have now, where producers will cast an actual stutterer because one who can fake a stutter is considered “ableist.” What a world!), Porky comes over to try and win Petunia’s hand in marriage, but it becomes clear that she only wants him because he bought chocolates and flowers. When Porky attempts suicide over being rejected and used, the hanging goes pear-shape and Porky sees what life would be like if he did marry Petunia.

The Channel(s): The WB

Part(s) Edited: Surprisingly, Porky’s botched suicide wasn’t cut, nor was Porky and Petunia going straight to the Honeymoon Hotel, kissing, and turning off the lights (the shorthand way of showing sex on a wedding night in Hays Code-censored movies. They probably still do it today, but only as a joke or if something is meant to be PG instead of PG-13 [which sadly seems to be as far as most creatives are willing to go. I want my R, NC-17, and unrated entertainment that’s not confined to HBO and premium cable. And maybe G-rated stuff, since that's not as common as it used to be]), Petunia feeding chocolates to her dog (which is extremely dangerous to do), or Petunia beating Porky with a rolling pin (classic female-on-male domestic abuse schtick. It’s a total double standard that “You Beat Your Wife” gets censored on The WB, but not that part).

Nah, fam. What got cut was the very end, where, after Petunia wakes Porky up from his suicide attempt and agrees to marry him after turning him down, Porky (thinking back to the nightmare where his blushing bride becomes a slovenly, unashamed housewife who feeds chocolate to her dog and nags Porky about the housework and childcare) decides, “Screw that!” and bolts, but not before coming back to retrieve the box of chocolate and give Petunia’s dog a well-deserved kick in the ass. The WB didn’t appreciate Porky kicking the dog, so it was cut.

What Grinds My Gears About the Edit: Nothing, except for the whole double standard about how “Wideo Wabbit”’s “You Beat Your Wife” part was censored, yet Petunia whaling on Porky with a rolling pin was uncut. That’s more a Tumblr argument and I was only into Tumblr to find like-minded people who want to be better fiction writers and thought Cartoon Network’s Time Squad (from 2001) was rife with homosexual innuendo and jokes more suited for Adult Swim rather than daytime Cartoon Network (which it is. Rob Paulsen’s podcast episodes with Mark Hamill and Pamela Segall-Adlon say so and co-creator Carlos Ramos [who has his own Tumblr filled with weird art and answers to fan questions] agrees).

How It Plays Edited/Video Comparison: 

The ending is abrupt, but not annoyingly so. Ending it with Porky running away after retrieving his chocolates (or even with Porky running off and leaving Petunia and the chocolates behind) is more believable story-wise, as it shows that Petunia only liked Porky because he had chocolates for her and the dream showed what would happen if Porky did marry Petunia and she continued her chocolate eating. Either taking the chocolates away from her or leaving her with them is a final “Screw you!” to her and everything she stands for when it comes to shy men (or anthropomorphic pigs) trying to pour their hearts out to high-maintenance women (or high-maintenance, anthropomorphic sows in this case, since a sow is a female pig, but that word can be used like “bitch” or “cow” to be a derogatory term for a woman, whether deserved or not) who just aren’t feeling it.

Availability Uncut: Your choice: The Looney Tunes Golden Collection, volume 3 DVD set (on the third disc with optional commentary by Mark Kausler) or the Porky Pig 101 DVD (disc 2). It, sadly, isn’t available for streaming or digital download (so, no HBO Max, no Warner MediaRIDE, no Amazon Prime Video, no iTunes, No Boomerang streaming, and definitely no Tubi) as of this writing.

‘Til next time…

Golddiggers of '49 (Of Mice and Laundrymen/Shot-Tub Party)

Director: Fred Avery (you probably know him better under the name "Tex Avery")

Summary: Yay! We're finally into the fast-paced, gag-packed, irreverent side of Looney Tunes cartoons (a.k.a, the kind everyone remembers and can quote better than most classic episodes of The Simpsons). It's not a perfect start, but it's still a start. We still have a ways to go, but it's not an anodyne musical or a Buddy cartoon. Anyway, this cartoon is a Beans the Cat cartoon (but really features Porky Pig more) where it's the Gold Rush and Beans finds the mother lode, which means everyone in town (including some Chinese laundrymen) want a piece of the action.

The Channel: Nickelodeon (both the Nick@Nite black and white version and the computer-colorized daytime/weekend version of Looney Tunes on Nickelodeon).

Part(s) Edited: Today, we have two titles for two cuts that were done. Let's start with "Of Mice and Laundrymen": Both the Nick@Nite and the daytime versions of Looney Tunes on Nickelodeon cut all scenes featuring the Chinese laundrymen digging for gold just like everyone else, including one scene where the laundrymen riding on a rickshaw -- because, why not? -- are trailing behind Porky's junker of a car and get covered in a cloud of exhaust where they turn into (who else?) Amos 'n Andy from the radio show of the same name, complete with blackface and ethnically iffy voices.

On to "Shot-Tub Party": Nickelodeon's daytime version (which was computer-colorized in the 1990s, as opposed to the horrid 1960s redrawns that managed to suck all the fun out of the animation, especially in the black and white Bob Clampett shorts) not only edited the scenes with the Chinese laundrymen looking for gold, but also cut the part where Beans shoots at the villain with his rifle, the bullets hit the villain's backside into a drop-seat onesie-type opening, which reveals that the villain didn't get hurt because his butt was protected by a metal tub. I'm...guessing this was cut because it looked too inviting to impressionable viewers to imitate? Yeah, I know Nickelodeon cut gun violence and dangerous behavior just like any other American TV channel at the time, but this only makes partial sense to me. Did they really think most kids back then had metal tubs just randomly lying around, looking to make for an ineffective shield for bullets?

How It Plays Edited: Considering the fast pace of the cartoon, the edits do come off as seamless and they were more joke scenes than plot scenes. However, the jump in audio should tip you off that there's something missing (on all three edits). As always, here's a video comparison.

Availability Uncut: You have three choices: you can enjoy it as a special feature on the DVD release of the film Gold Diggers of 1935, or on the fourth disc of the fifth volume of the Looney Tunes Golden Collection DVD, or as part of the first disc of the Porky Pig 101 DVD.

Bosko's Picture Show (Hit-ler and Miss, or Meet the Fawkers)

 

Director: Hugh Harmon and Isadore "Friz" Freleng

Summary: In this, the last Bosko short made for Warner Bros/Leon Schelsinger studios, Bosko shows viewers what a night at the movies was like back in the early 1930s. There were sing-alongs with actual in-house organ players, a newsreel showing world events, a short film featuring comedy duo Laurel and Hardy (though some theaters showed other shorts from comedy duos -- and trios, in the case of The Three Stooges), and a melodrama where Honey is in danger of being kidnapped by Dirty Dalton (the cur!).

The Channel: Nickelodeon (Looney Tunes on Nickelodeon -- Nick @ Nite version; as of the second airing)

Part(s) Edited:

• The “Out of Tone” newsreel sequence is missing the story of a Hollywood screen lover (Jimmy Durante) spending his vacation in Germany getting chased by Adolf Hitler (in what is commonly believed to be his first caricatured appearance in an American cartoon. “Cubby’s World Flight”, an obscure short made around the same time as this, is considered the first, but when was the last time you’ve heard someone talk about Cubby?) with an axe.
• During the melodrama He Done Her Dirt (And How!), Bosko shouts “The dirty fuck!” when he sees Dirty Dalton (the cur!) sneak onscreen on a wheel-less bicycle. The first time Nickelodeon aired this short, that part wasn’t cut (or so it’s believed). Starting with the second time, “The dirty fuck!” was changed to “The dirty cur!” (with “cur” being recycled from the part near the end where Bosko yells, “Stop, you cur!” before jumping through the movie screen).

How It Plays Edited: The first cut doesn’t really affect the overall short. The abrupt cut in audio might hint at something missing, but it can logically be written off as a scene that was cut before theatrical release, not a scene that was edited when aired on television. As for the second cut, it’s obvious that something’s been changed, as this video will show you:

Availability Uncut: The only official release it has (as of 2024) is on the Looney Tunes Golden Collection volume six (on the third disc dedicated to Bosko, Buddy, and one-shot black and white musicals). As it’s still under copyright, you’re not going to find the whole thing on YouTube. You might find clips of the infamous “dirty fuck” line and a review/commentary or two, but no full cartoon. Archive.org does have it uncut, but even that website has had copyrighted videos taken down, so catch it while you can or just shell out money for an official release.

EDIT: “Bosko’s Picture Show” can also be found as a special feature on the Blu-ray release of the movie Lilly Turner, starring Ruth Chatterton and George Brent. The movie was released on Blu-ray this year; that’s why it was never mentioned until now.

Final Thoughts and Miscellany: If you’re wondering whether or not Bosko actually did call Dirty Dalton a “dirty fuck,” then you’re not alone. A lot of classic animation fans and historians have argued this. Some believe that Harman and Ising wouldn’t go that far, since this was the time that the Hays Code was in effect, but no one really took it seriously until mid-1934 (this cartoon was released in 1933, so dicey content in American movies still popped up here and there. You can visit pre-code.com or just look up “pre-Code movies” on YouTube or whatever search engine you prefer if you want to learn some American film history before its Golden Age) and think that Bosko called Dirty Dalton a “dirty fox” (which is the line in the closed captions/subtitles on the Looney Tunes Golden Collection volume six version) or a “dirty mug”. While Mark Kausler (animator and director of the 1991 animated version of Beauty and the Beast, the 1994 animated version of The Lion King, and 2001’s Osmosis Jones) thinks Bosko’s line was “the dirty mug,” according to lip sync and a perceived soundtrack flaw that turned an innocent word obscene, animation historian Jerry Beck had several people see the film, with all of them concluding that Bosko indeed called Dirty Dalton a “dirty fuck.” As for me, I believe Bosko did say “dirty fuck,” but it sounded more like “dirty fock” (rhymes with “hawk”). Guess if the short “u” sound was replaced with an "aw" digraph sound, no one would know the difference back then.

Then there’s the question of why Harman and Ising would let this slip. Was it because films back then were trying to be as subversive and obscene as possible, which caused the Hays Office to censor films more harshly after mid-1934, since the Code wasn’t as enforced as it should have been when it first came out in 1930? Were Harman and Ising so mad at Leon Schlesinger over budget issues that this was their “screw you”/“up yours”/“take this job and shove it” (all of which would be too rude to say or imply under the Hays Code, just so you know) moment that led them to go work for MGM? Or is it actually just an innocent word turned rude?

The Big Man From the North (Born Under a Backside)

 

Director: Hugh Harman and Rudolf Ising

Summary: Bosko is a Canadian Mountie whose sergeant assigns him the task to catch a wanted criminal, dead or alive. Like most cartoon shorts of the time at Warner Bros., expect a lot of music numbers and gags that eat up a lot of clock to cover for a thin plot.

Part(s) Edited: The version that aired on Nickelodeon’s Looney Tunes on Nick (the Nick at Nite version where it was mostly black and white shorts) cut the scene of the outlaw getting stuck in the saloon doors, Bosko grabbing the outlaw’s knife, and plunging it into his rear end. Despite this, Bosko popping out of the spittoon and firing a machine gun into the bad guy’s butt wasn’t cut. Did the Nickelodeon censors feel that the knife in the butt was more of a threat to be imitated? It did look like it could be easily done and knives are more accessible than guns, even though I live in America, where the gun/knife accessibility ratio is 50/50 or more, depending on the state laws and any precedent from previous court cases.

How It Plays With the Edit: Why should I tell you how it plays out when I can show you? Here’s how it plays out uncut (start point at 6:33):

And here’s a clip from the censored version:

Availability Uncut: So far, the only physical media that has this short are the DVD release of the 1931 gangster film, Smart Money, starring James Cagney and Edward G. Robinson and volume three of the Warner Gangster Collection DVD set. It’s not on any Warner cartoon collections (at least, not as of this writing), either in physical media or on streaming, nor has it aired on television since its days on Looney Tunes on Nickelodeon (it may have made an appearance on Cartoon Network’s Late Night Black and White, but I haven’t seen it there. Someone else can correct me on this). However, all is not lost. This cartoon has been in the public domain since 1958 and can easily be found on YouTube or whatever video website you prefer.

Hold Anything (Head of Mouse-hold)

Director: Hugh Harman and Rudolf Ising

Summary: Bosko is a construction worker who impresses Honey by making music from everything in sight, including a decapitated mouse, a typewriter, and a goat filled with hot air. I don't know how best to describe it. The early Warner Bros. shorts were weird in their lack of a coherent plot and characterization.

Part(s) Edited: Nickelodeon strikes again with their edits. This time, they cut Bosko decapitating the Mickey Mouse-looking mouse (and the mouse trying to get its head back) as Bosko tosses the mouse back and forth on the saw. It's not as gruesome as it sounds (mostly because it's played for laughs and musicality), but I do kind of understand why Nickelodeon would consider it inappropriate for kids/family TV, especially back in the late 1980s, early 1990s when censorship was a bit more strict on the violence/dangerous behavior front. Thanks to OpenShot Video Editor, I did a recreation of how I think the edit played out on Nickelodeon. 

Please note: I was too young to remember when Nickelodeon aired Bosko cartoons on Nick at Nite (but I do remember when they aired Daffy/Speedy cartoons on their daytime version of Looney Tunes on Nickelodeon), so this isn't 100% actual evidence.

How It Plays With the Edit: Besides a mild jump in the audio (and the fact that the early Warner Bros. cartoons didn't have much in the way of a story or plot), the edit doesn't make or break the cartoon. Get used to this type of evaluation. It will be semi-frequent.

Availability Uncut: Bad news: it's not on any official Warner Bros. DVD or Blu-ray release as of this writing, nor is it on any streaming service, such as HBO Max (or Max, as it's now known), Warner Media RIDE, or even Boomerang (whose streaming service has more classic cartoons than the actual channel). The good news: this short is public domain, so YouTube and other video sites should have it uncut and uncensored (and maybe, just maybe, you can find the edited-on-Nickelodeon version since there are people out there who want to upload the stuff they recorded on their VCRs back when that was common). Here's the full short on  YouTube (the quality isn't the best, but it is uncut and uncensored).